You have made it - you are working in your dream job. You are making more money than you could have imagined. Everything you’ve ever wanted is at your fingertips. Life is perfect. Yet somehow, you are still broke.
If you are like many of us who think, “If I can just get to this income level, everything will be okay,” but then it isn't, you are not alone. Too often, it has been my experience that more problems seem to arise when you make more money. Why is this? We have been told repeatedly through media and our families that getting a good job will help us make more money, and everything will be okay.
This is not entirely true.
Chances are, you have learned valuable skills in a particular area that allow you to earn a great living, but you never learned the disciplines of setting aside money, how to understand investing, how to read a net worth statement, how to create a budget, how to live with the emotional responsibility of money. Perhaps you even have negative unconscious feelings about money that cause you to do things with your money that you don't want to do. One example might be that in your family you learned that having money is equated with being greedy. So just below your conscious thought life inorder to make sure that you don’t appear greedy you don't save any of your money or many be you find yourself giving your family a lot of money, that way you can’t be accused of being greedy. Ultimately the reasons why you don't manage your income well are numerous and complex.
Yet what really stops you from managing your money well at this point is shame and embarrassment. Your thinking probably goes something like this: “I am a rock star at XYZ work, and what would my collegues and family think of me if they knew I didn't know how to manage my money well? I couldn't possibly let someone know that I don't know what I am doing with my finances. I don't want to appear incompetent, stupid, silly, naive, irresponsible, etc.” The pressure heats up even more in our home life when we don't want to own up to our spouses that we might be a little lost.
Here is the reality: managing personal finance is a skill. Nobody is born with the magical gene of good financial management. Just like you didn't become a rock star at your work overnight, you cannot expect to become an expert at managing and talking about your finances in the blink of an eye. Over time and with some vulnerability, you can start to develop the skills necessary to feel like you have control over your finances.
The good news is you’re successful and highly talented. The bad news is that those skills don't necessarily translate into being a personal finance master. So, if you are feeling frustrated that you are making more money than you imagined but continue to struggle financially, you are not alone. The problem is that most of us are too embarrassed to talk about it. We want to appear as if we have it all together. It is frustrating when money is one of the most talked about subjects in media and yet, in our personal lives, we still feel lost on how to actually manage our household finances. We feel uncertain about what to believe and how much time we should put into managing the household finances. When we don’t see eye-to-eye with our spouses about money, it is sometimes easier to just throw up our hands and say, “I quit. I will just go make more money to solve this problem.”
So, if you are making more money then you ever imagined and still feel broke, take a risk and ask for help. Asking a trained Certified Financial Planner who will not judge you for your current situation and will offer advice and guidance can become a powerful step toward getting control over your money.
Feel free to give me a call to talk more at 980-275-1627.
Ed Coambs
Edited by Reena Arora of Arora Media, connect on Facebook
For all your communication needs, she is all you need.
Grow your marriage by getting all the latest blog posts.
